To OCD:

Dear OCD-like tendencies,
Why must you always appear late at night?  Remember that morning my Chloe friend texted me & said my fonts were crazy huge?  Remember how I didn't really know what she was talking about, only to discover later that night that they'd gotten screwed up when I re-did Cait's (though it didn't show up that way on my computer for a long time)?  Remember that?  Well, that lead to me having to fix mine, which apparently meant changing the font, which meant making a new header & a new button &...now it's 1:44 am.  Thanks, OCD.  Thanks a lot.
Love Sincerely,


P.S. I have a new button...go grab for your blog if you like :)

P.S.S. If you ever see my blog looking RIDICULOUS, know that I am probably at that very moment in the process of fixing it...& stressing over how ugly it is & hoping people don't think I designed it that way.

P.S.S.S. Apparently I need to get a life.

where lies your devotion?

"There is a vast difference between devotion to a person & devotion to principles or a cause.  Our Lord never proclaimed a cause -- He proclaimed personal devotion to Himself." (My Utmost for His Highest)

I loved how this was put...I often get frustrated because I feel like there a lot of "do gooders" these days.  I see this in "real life" everyday, but also in Hollywood all. the. time.  I'm addicted to People magazine...I'll admit it.  Every time I open it up or click to the site online, I see celebrities being praised for their support of a "cause."  Some I'm sure are doing it for the right reasons, but often not.  Adopting kids from third world countries, building homes for those in need, caring for the environment, rebuilding after a natural disaster, feeding the hungry, etc...these are all good things to do, but they should be done for His glory...not our own.

Even as a Christian, this is hard to keep in check sometimes.  I often have to ask myself if the good things I'm doing are because I feel a compassion for the people because I feel sorry for them, or because I feel a compassion for the people because they are His & I want to glorify Him by helping them in what little ways I can.

"Whenever the Holy Spirit sees an opportunity to glorify Jesus through you, He will take your entire being & set you ablaze with glowing devotion to Jesus Christ." (My Utmost for His Highest)

Cait, don't read this yet!

I think my heart just started beating normally again.

Grey's = most intense, depressing two hours of television I've ever watched in my life.  I haven't recovered from Private Practice last week yet, & now they throw that on me?!?!  What was ABC thinking?

I like drama.  As in TV drama, not drama queen drama.  I do not, however, like wondering whether any of the cast is going to be alive at the end of the show.

For awhile, I was wondering if the economy was so bad that ABC couldn't have that many characters on one show & they were killing them off for financial reasons.

Now, I'm in need of some TV therapy.  Bring on the Office.  Jim Halpert never fails to make me smile.

And on the Office, I can guarantee...
no GSWs
no transfusions
no one dying in elevators

no girls making out
no SWAT team
no shooters
no miscarriages
no death
no near-death
no blood.

Goodbye, Seattle.
Hello, Scranton.

"One for Valentine's Day"

I went to see Valentine's Day tonight [very cute movie, by the way].  I did buy one ticket [though ironically, they charged me for 2]...but don't worry, I wasn't alone.  However, I was not one of the zillions [yes, zillions] who flocked to theaters across the country to see Valentine's Day on Valentine's Day...probably with a date.

I went with a bunch of sisters & friends.  :)  And I'm totally okay with that.  Actually I'd rather see a movie like that with girls than with a boy.

Annnnyway...kind of getting away from what I wanted to write about.  I hate [& I do mean HATE] the way so many people view Valentine's Day.  A quick little trip to Wikipedia will tell you about how a pope established Valentine's Day in AD 496 to be a celebration of "love and affection between intimate companions".  It wasn't until the middle ages & Chaucer that it became associated with romantic love.  There you go...history lesson for today.

I would totally bash on it being called "Single's Awareness Day" if Chris Tomlin hadn't jokingly called it that at Passion City Church last week [& I do love Chris], so I'll only slightly bash it.  Yes, I'm single & I'm okay about that.  In fact, I'm glad.  For several reasons, but the #1 reason has come about recently.  I know God's bringing the right one in His perfect timing yada yada ya [not to downplay God's timing at all...us single girls just hear that a lot], but I've recently come to think about the whole situation a little differently.

Most of you know that I graduate this semester [April 30!!!] & have been applying...& applying...& applying for jobs.  I know I want to do something with some Christian organization, but at this point I'm not exactly sure what or where or any of the details.  I have my top choices & places that I feel like God is nudging me...but we'll see.  Anyway, almost every single one has a little paragraph in there somewhere about if you are married, they feel that you & your spouse should both be called to the ministry.  Working in a full-time ministry position is something that both must be called to.  It's not always a normal 9-5 job.  It's often one that requires more time, stranger hours, more devotion, & much more of your heart.  So if this is where I feel God leading me, I sure hope He's leading my husband there, too.  Just thinking about that makes me so excited.  He is so loved & so prayed for already & I don't even know him.  I always pray for him & his ministry, whatever that may be, but now I feel like when I pray about a job, I may even be praying myself to him.  I may be totally wrong about all of this, & if I am, okay.  But this time, I don't really feel like I am.  I feel like it's coming...he's coming...& when we meet, I'll be ready!

Okay, so that's part of it.  Switching gears.  Why can't Valentine's Day just be about love like it was originally intended?  I love pink & red [2 of my favorite colors], I love my future husband, I love God, my family, my sisters, my friends.  So what if I don't have a boyfriend, fiancee, or husband?  I don't need them in my life right now!  I've felt this way for several years, but even more so this year.  I was adamant that my "people" were going to know on that day that I love them & am praying for them.  And for you single girls, I'm praying for your husbands, too.  So yes, I'm single & I love Valentine's Day.  So there.

And one more thing...this is really unrelated.  Kind of.  But it's about Valentine's Day.  Michelle told us last week at Bible Study about a place in Atlanta that helps rescue young girls from sex trafficking and give them a place to live.  They were wanting people to flood their mailboxes with valentines that day so that they would feel loved.  I love that.  So Brandi & Sara & I made about 20 valentines that night & mailed off to them.  So cool what these people are doing & great that in a tiny way we got to take part & show our love & God's love for them this Valentine's Day.